I think we all know that teens make poor choices. The very essence of being a teen is trying and sometimes failing, or making the wrong choice.
Yesterday Adrienne returned at dinner time after playing in a Sophomore vs Junior softball game. It’s a coed fun event sponsored by the SGA and the winning overall team plays a faculty team tonight. She came home with news. A girl, whom we will call Mary Jane, just because it’s a funny play on words, was expelled from school last week. Adrienne just learned this yesterday. MJ had been a transfer student from a local Christian school this year, she is a junior and she played on the HS softball team with A this year. We knew of MJ from travel ball and she was a solid player. Her mom was at every game and knew the sport well. We had high hopes of MJ helping the team even more next year.
MJ was expelled because she was caught with marijuana at school. My first instinct was to roll my eyes and loudly exclaim…..how stupid!
I want you to know I was not a perfect teen or young adult. I did many stupid things. I was a teen of the 70’s and yes I’ve tried pot. I wasn’t that impressed with it, and in reality, I’m a very frugal person when it comes to what I’m going to spend money on. Drugs would never have been something I could see as a good use of my funds.
The other thing you may not know about me is that I’m a rule follower. I’ve taken risks yes, but as an adult I tend to go with the reasoning that if something is illegal its best to not partake of it. I also rationalize that the consequences for not following the law are stiff, and not anything I’d enjoy.
This comment is one I’ve heard batted around, I don’t buy it. A does not lead to B but IMO, why start with A. I’ve got similar thoughts on teen drinking.
I’m not naive, I know this stuff happens, it happened in the 70’s too………but I was not really a party girl.
How did we discuss this with our 15 year old? We asked her what she thought. She stated that she thought MJ was stupid, and that she hung out with the wrong people. Whew………at least she didn’t say it was only pot! Adrienne thought that MJ was even more stupid for bringing it to school. No we don’t know any real details, but we do agree that it was a poor choice, on every level. I thought about this a lot last night. My girls are not friends with the drinkers or smokers or the party kids, they know they are out there and they steer clear. I felt sad for MJ and her family. What happens when you are expelled 4 weeks before the end of the year? What happens to those unfinished credits? Rumor has it her parents are moving her back to the smaller Christian school. I just feel sad when people stumble so much and have to pull themselves up to get back on track.
Honestly, being a parent is so much more difficult than anyone tells you. It’s also the most rewarding thing. This same teen that tells me this stuff and gets mad at me for telling her to turn her cell phone off to study and for making her plug it in in my bedroom because she’s had problems knowing when to say when, this girl hugs me each night before bed, she tells me she loves me every day, and I think she is glad that we are involved, but not always hovering. I love Adrienne.