Social Networking sites

January 14, 2010 Uncategorized 13

Well all know them, facebook, my space, twitter………the sites where we post our status, our mood, our daily goings on, our pictures, heck last week, our bra color in support of breast cancer awareness……………..but rules, what are the rules?
I’ve wondered for a while about what I think is acceptable, and what drives me batty……and now I’m going to write about it……because I know I’m not alone.
The first thing that comes to mind is the one line dramatic post, you’ve seen it, the line that says my life is awful, why me, or more graphic lingo for things are really crappy. I don’t mind if someone writes” lousy day, school was awful” or had an accident, all fine, car a mess”, or things like that, but the obvious cry out for attention grabbing posts and friends to say, oh what happened are you ok etc………….they just annoy me. If this is you…………stop it now!!! Say what you want, don’t pussy foot around and just put it out there!

Appropriate………hmmmm, what is stuff you want people to know that isn’t too personal? It’s okay to put out there that the kids are sick, or that you aren’t feeling well, but recently an online acquaintance posted quite casually that she’d had a miscarriage. My heart goes out to anyone that loses a child, how devastating, but honestly is facebook the place to put that? Isn’t it more personal, something you want to share with family and friends at your own pace, so they know? This woman didn’t even know she was pregnant, wasn’t trying to conceive. I guess my thoughts would just not be to announce it like that on FB. I chose not to put on FB when my dad fell in the shower, yes I wanted support and prayers for him, but it just wasn’t for me. Honestly many of my local friends don’t even know about it, my dad is 1000 miles away, they don’t know him, and we were on holiday so I just didn’t tell them. Maybe I’m willing to put on FB when my teens drive me to drink, but not about my dad’s health, I don’t know. So if you are putting uber intimate details of you life on FB, think about it, does the guy you went to grade school with,who found you from your other HS classmates really want to know about the personal stuff? It’s only my opinion, but some things just don’t belong out there like that.

My other concerns always involve privacy and safety. I’ve put on FB that I’m traveling etc, and then sure maybe I shouldn’t maybe some friend of a friend might be out there ready to rob my house(huge disappointment let me tell you). I have my kids names and pictures out there……heck on the blog too. I worry more about my teens and tween son, are they protecting their privacy and watching what they say or who they friend? I do watch what they do, and honestly none of them are as addicted to social sites as much as I am….ha ha!!!

So maybe I should write a book, I’m already sure there is a FaceBook for Dummies, but what about a Social Networking Etiquette for Dummies? HMMMMMMMMMM??

13 Responses to “Social Networking sites”

  1. mama-face

    yes yes. I agree with it all. When my dear friend passed away people were announcing it on their statuses. So inappropriate. ugh. Having something like that right next to a status like “I ate a doughnut for breakfast”…grrrr And the vacation ones? That’s just dumb.

    Now, I just write crazy statuses that leave people shaking their heads. It’s when people take me seriously that I get into trouble.

    Let’s talk about SPELLING…

    Well, I complain about it but I still find myself checking it WAY too often. πŸ™‚

  2. Life is good!

    i just hate reading EVERY little personal and non personal thing a person does, on facebook. those that share more than i care about i hide! what i really should do is not go on facebook. i feel like a stalker, i rarely post anything but peek into others lives when i am bored.

  3. Anonymous

    Honestly, Facebook is limited as to what I will post. The most personal things in my life I share with my online friends, or even on a public message board, blog, etc. I don’t know why that seems more private. I guess because other people I know on Facebook may see me more day to day or it feels like they would be more likely to judge me. I don’t want to discuss personal stuff about myself in the parent wait line at preschool and such.

  4. Anita

    Hi Anita – it’s Anita!
    I see we have more in common today than our name!
    Just read your comment on my FB post and had to come right over to read yours.
    You have a different spin, but I understand all of what you’ve said.
    I’ll be checking back to compare your readers comments with mine. Between the two of us, we should get some good FB feedback.
    Small world, as they say. πŸ™‚

  5. Robin

    Hey There, found you from Anita above, I agree totally I just keep the two separate and only use facebook for connecting with family far away..sharing pics. Im a new follower..!

  6. Pam

    I have to agree with you Anita. Especially about the doom and gloom one liners. I must admit I’ve very disillusioned with FB. I was into it for a month or so, but I haven’t looked at it in ages. It seems people are either simply “collecting” friends or they’re sharing inane details about their days. Ugh! It WAS fun to reconnect with a few old college friends I had lost contact with, but as soon as we finished catching up with each other through the messaging feature, I lost interest. I totally get what you’re saying!

  7. Elizabeth

    I guess my FB is different : I don’t add everyone I know. Everyone on my list is family, close friends, or people I’ve met through blogging that read everything anyway. I joined FB for the sole purpose of updating EVERYONE without having to use the phone because the drama before if I called some people and not others was getting on my nerves. Thank God for FB during all of Zack’s hospital moments these last 2 months. Because updating every grandparent, aunt, uncle, friend, etc on the phone wouldn’t have happened. And there would have been a lot of resentful people that heard it from someone who heard it from someone who heard it from someone and then called me offended that I hadn’t told them personally. Been there, done that. Yay for FB! πŸ™‚

    And about announcing sad things… I hope it didn’t bother you that I announced when we lost Jason’s grandparents. Again, my list is selective. And it was really nice not to have to talk to people about it over the phone when I could barely handle thinking about it without bawling :

  8. Texas Mom

    Hey there Anita! I enjoyed your post. Thought I would share my two… well you know. Anyways, I think it all comes down to personal preference and personality. I, as you know, am an open person. I say what I am feeling and mostly let it all hang out. I’ve always struggled with doing the “right” thing in public WAY before this whole technology was in. Now, would I want to find out about a death on FB…. no way! But, there are differences in what some people think is appropriate and what is not. With that said….. I have a “friend” on facebook who ALWAYS uses the “f” word… it drives me insane. I am not an angel but I can’t imagine talking like that for all to see. I want to stop being her friend (that so sounds like grade school talk) because I don’t like it on my wall. How would I do that? Can I hide her updates? Any tips you have would be GREAT!

  9. My name is PJ.

    I’m private, intensely so in many areas. It was an enormous step for me to blog about personal things.

    I’ve yet to think of one thing in my life that I want to share with everyone I’ve ever known, everyone who has ever attended the same schools I have, everyone whose ever worked at IBM….etc. EWWWW!

    Etiquette and boundare on or off FB seem to be vanishing.

    Thanks for posting this!!

  10. suzicate

    I totally agree. And I keep my blog seperate from FB, also. In fact, I try to keep myself and family annonymous, and only shared with one of my sisters who has now sent it out to everyone when I let her guest post.Don’t know about you, but I find some(Not all of it) of my writing to be highly personal that I’d rather share with strangers than people I know. Is that weird?

  11. Crazy Mom of Three

    I had to get a new password. I guess I had changed it when I signed up for google checkout and I did not realize this was related to that. Anyway, I was the anonymous poster above; I meant to let you know that. Crazy week!

  12. Ali

    I know I prefer family updates over the numerous random bible quotes and song lyrics–that drives me nuts! There’s one FB friend who constantly talks about how much she loves her husband and oh he’s so awesome and amazing and caring–it makes me want to throw up. She even mentioned rose petals in the bathtub once. TMI!

  13. Sandy

    You’re right all around. I don’t do much with FB with personal status posts but I have to say that over the last year I have gotten info about family and friends through it. I worked hard initially trying to find people I haven’t seen in years. Then I found them, said hi and that was about it.

    And despite being told over and over again to be careful what they post on all these sites, people still continue to post inappropriate things which are probably going to bite them in the butts later.

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